Slammed & Split

Thanks

Download Thanks as an mp3

I went to wipe my lenses,
those windows to my soul,
and she said she saw a stud.

I thought she was just being
that friend
that good friend
that great friend
who only wants you
to believe in yourself
with they same fervor that they do.

And even if it's true,
it's hard to believe it, too.
Until you follow through
get laser surgery
on eye one and eye two,
then go out to bars
like you usually do.

You find girls start offering
to buy drinks for you
so early and often
it becomes a deluge
and you find yourself
in some other self's shoes,
slipping and sliding
down this lady-loaded luge
swelling your ego,
making it huge.

But this can't be right —
it's got you all confused:
You used to be some guy,
now, you're the DUDE.
And not to be rude,
but you lack apititude
to express gratitude
to Edna
who we now know
always knew.